Internet Soup

After leaving PETA headquarters and barely escaping the once-every-five-years snowfall in Norfolk, it looks as if I’ve brought the bad weather with me to Long Island. No worries, though, I’ve got just the thing to keep me warm this frigid season: a steaming bowl of Internet Soup! The latest serving is farm-stand fresh with no preservatives added—just some wholesome, delicious virtual weirdness. Bon appétit …

• A tinkle in time … ruins meat? Oh, yes! Just ask the man who took a leak on steaks at Wal-Mart.
• Here’s one for the ice ages: A kind crew rescues a dog who was stranded on an ice floe.
• Underwater fashion show! Check out how these classy crabs accessorize.
• Way to paint the gown red! Creative opponents of the Canadian seal slaughter ingeniously doctored this picture of Miss Teen Newfoundland wearing a seal carcass.
• Watch out, Lil’ Wayne—you’ve got some legit competition from these lil’ rhymesters, who won’t take nothin’ from KFC or McDonald’s.
• To see it is to … eat it: A biologist has discovered a sea animal who eats sun.
• This Boston court took “cat-calling” literally when it actually called a cat to jury duty.

Hope that was more than enough to warm you up until our next dose!

Written by Logan Scherer